Dear Evil Engineer,

I am a creature of darkness, by which I mean that I am nocturnal. I suffer from extraordinary light sensitivity, which forces me to restrict my waking hours to between dusk and dawn. This is of great inconvenience to me, particularly in summer. I resent being unsynchronised with the rest of the world. I live in a town in East Europe and its nightlife scene consists of some kebab shops, the second-nicest gym in town, and a golf-themed bar. Diurnal normativity has caused silent suffering for my kind for many centuries.

The rest of the world must be forced to experience this life of darkness. Could you tell me how to put a big pair of sunglasses on the Earth, so the sun no longer shines on the world?

Yours,
A vampire

 

Dear villain,

Your letter touches on a controversial subject: solar radiation management. Some argue that it’s critical to give serious consideration to drastic geoengineering, given that carbon emissions are not being cut...