Dear Evil Engineer,
Last week, a gang of kids and their dog broke into my high-security evil facility. They were eventually caught and fed to the sharks, but not before causing chaos among my guards. Four fell into the shark pool, two were killed by friendly fire, one perished from a ferocious chihuahua bite, and one fell a great height from a ramp and barely survived. That guard is being kept alive in an iron lung in my cellar, but everything below the neck resembles steak tartare and it seems he’ll never crush a skull in his bare fists ever again.
I am reluctant to say goodbye to this guard. It’s not easy recruiting guards so utterly without human conscience. Would it be possible to transfer his brain into a fresh body – perhaps the body of a bear?
Yours,
A canny villain
Dear villain,
While I must applaud you for your out-of-the-box thinking, I’m afraid that brain transplants are not nearly possible at this point, even when both donor and recipient...